Skunk flights of fancy

fosteronfilm and I have odd chats. Mostly, I think my husband humors me, but he also has a delightfully whimsical streak which I love. Yesterday, I took it into my head to teach Hobkin how to “sit.” Erm. I’ve had better ideas. Anyway, in the ensuing discussion I had with my hubby, I then suggested I might try teaching Hobkin how to trot and canter. That obviously led to the subject of Hobkin as a mount . . . for a very, very small rider, like say a pixie or a sprite. Consequently, I spent some time watching Hobkin trundling about the house. He’s got short, stumpy legs, which results in a pronounced rolling gait. I can’t imagine that would be a very comfortable ride. Probably a lot of dizzying rocking back and forth and bumpiting, but on the other hand, he’d be very very soft to sit on. I went so far as to suggest out loud that I tie a stuffed animal or paper doll onto Hobkin’s back to see how they would ride. Wiser minds (fosteronfilm‘s) stepped in and nixed that idea. But he did go on to say that a sprite would probably be the best rider for Hobkin because their wings could serve as sort of a stabilizer against the worst of Hobkin’s trundling–assuming, of course, that they could avoid being eaten by their erstwhile mount. At that point, I dissolved into giggles.

Not a riding animal:

   


Writing Stuff

Received:
14-day rejection from Fictitious Force after making the second round of readings.
129-day “I have held onto this tale based upon the strength of your writing. However . . . ” from Shadowed Realms with invite to submit again.

Fooie.

In better news, I published a Tangent review written by sartorias for Paradox #7 and she had lovely things to say about my “The Tiger Fortune Princess”:

“Foster writes with a graceful, easy touch, with just the right images, making the story into a tapestry.  We’ve already seen the whole from the beginning, but that in no way takes away from the pleasure of going over it bit by bit in order to savor the details.”
–Sherwood Smith, Tangent

IgNobel and City of If

Haven’t had a drop of alcohol, but my wingstubs were bugging me, so I took a Clonazepam. Now I am loopy. When I try to walk, I stagger and stumble about with my balance all wonkified, and fosteronfilm informs me my speech is slurring. And there’s a certain mild euphoria going on. Wheeeee!

For something completely different: science is sometimes less than lofty. Check out the IgNobel awards. At last, recognition for the uninspired, pointless, and possibly profoundly underfunded scientific research studies. I’m especially amused by the Biology (“A Survey of Frog Odorous Secretions”) and Fluid Dynamics (“Pressures Produced When Penguins Pooh”) winners.

   


Writing Stuff

I’m waiting on pins and needles for a couple responses from editors, and as I did my little mailbox pilgrimages yesterday, I was thinking about a a great invention: a mailbox sensor that triggers a buzzer inside the house when a delivery happens. If I had one of those, I wouldn’t have to keep running back and forth between the window and the couch (if I’m lucky and have something outgoing) to see if the flag’s been dropped, or worse, making several fruitless trips to the mailbox and undoubtedly being perceived by my neighbors as the crazy mailbox lady*. This nifty device would ensure that I’d always know exactly when the mail carrier arrived.

That’s just sad, isn’t it? And I’d probably end up like one of Pavlov’s dog and start drooling every time the buzzer went off. Yes, my patience is fractured beyond the telling of it. That muscle don’t work so good.

Thanks to this post of tiellan‘s, I applied for a fantasy writing contract job. Had a phone interview for it yesterday (I cannot stress how very much I suck at phone interviews; written correspondence or face-to-face, it’s all good, on the phone, I fall apart) and I appear to have lined myself up a tentative contract gig. Details to be hammered out in the nearish future, but the plan is that I’ll be doing 6-8 weeks of essentially work-for-hire in Dec/Jan, writing 1-2K word chapters every week for The City of If–an interactive, online RPG gaming site. There’s potential for longer-term contract work if the initial stint goes well. I’m pretty jazzed.

Thanks to a French Critter, I was able to determine that my French reprint of “The Storyteller’s Wife” is either out, or about to come out in the October 2005, (#19) issue of Faeries. On an amusing note, I’m sharing a ToC with Darrell Schweitzer. The cover art:


* Most days I’m too lazy to put on sunscreen to go check the mail because I’m outside for all of half a minute. But exposing myself to the full-on noontime sunny day Georgia UV rays, even for half a minute, is a no-no, putting me at risk for a Lupus flare-up. To solve this conundrum of laziness, I often use a (bright yellow) parasol to shade me during my extremely brief mail outings. I, in my scruffy Resident Evil t-shirt, jammy pants, and parasol, undoubtedly present a curious sight to the neighbors.

Wingstubs and Joss Whedon, no relation

Wingstubs giving me grief. Not sure why as I haven’t been keyboarding that vigorously lately, but my arms ache. Ow.

If you’re a Browncoat, clickie to see more proof that Joss Whedon is a directing god (link ganked from tomaqmar). By the sheer miracle of knowing what he’s doing, Joss saved money and time while shooting Serenity in Hollywood.

And, the official geek question of the hour: If Buffy and River were to duke it out, who would win?

   


Writing Stuff

Received:
– A form rejection from Guideposts for Kids. This was a long shot anyway. G4K is a Christian ‘zine and the story I subbed really . . . wasn’t.
– Also got a personal rejection from Escape Pod. Stephen requested to see more, actually asked to see a couple stories by name based on their title (from the bibliography on my website). Well, cool. I believe in giving editors what they want, so sent off one of them.
– Sale of “Kawaa, Naagan, and the Queen’s Diamond Necklace” to Dragonfly Spirit, a lovely new startup children’s ‘zine. My story is due out in their March 2006 issue. The editor is a fellow Critter and we’ve exchanged some friendly correspondence in the past so I’m quite pleased to be working with her.
– Two more Critters crits of my Korean folktale. It continues to be a crowd pleaser. Well, good.

Five idiosyncratic things about me

I’ve been posting an unusually large (for me) number of memes recently–this is the third (fourth if you count the Shakespeare and Firefly ones as separate) in the last week. This isn’t a trend, really! I just thought the recent fads making the rounds were more interesting than the typical quizzes and memes that usually circulate.

So:
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Writing Writing Writing

Got a shiny payment into my PayPal account from jinzi for “In Suffering Lies Salvation” which is due to be published in the Lent(ish) issue of anaisdotmfk.com. Suhweet! jinzi utterly rawks as an editor/publisher.

And hey, on that note, anyone out there get Chronicle, the DNA Publications industry ‘zine? The June issue mentions anaisdotmfk.com and I’m trying to scrounge up what they said. Anyone? Anyone?

Also wrote and published a review of this week’s SCI FICTION story, “The Canadian Who Came Almost All the Way Home From the Stars” by jaylake and specficrider to Tangent.

And after my mini I’m-so-overworked-and-over-stressed Tangent rant I got an email from someone interested in being a reviewer. Huzzah. The universe humors me sometimes.

New Words: 700
On “The Better to . . . ” I’ve got the remaining scenes sketched out in my head, but they seem resistant to being born onto the page. Grumf. Not sure if I can wrap this up in the next 1K. We’ll see.

Zokutou word meterZokutou word meter
5,643 / 6,500
(86.0%)

Club 100 For Writers
      13

500/day
      77

Mostly writing

I slept through most of yesterday. Apparently the weekend tuckered me out; I just don’t have any stamina anymore. Even the tiniest bit of activity exhausts me.

Stupid human suit.

In less aggravating news, the feel of Autumn is on the breeze. The trees are turning themselves gold and brown, the ground crackles with dried leaves when I walk over it, and the air is crisp with an undercurrent of impending cold. I love the seasons here in Georgia. It’s already dropping to the 40s at night in the Midwest where I used to live, but here it’s lingering between the 60s and the low 80s. Perfect. Time to fill up the hot tub. Ooo, and time to put up the Halloween decorations!

   


Writing Stuff

I’ve noticed that now that I’ve gotten Tangent back on a regular publication schedule, editors, readers, and writers are much more anxious about getting their ‘zines reviewed yesterday. Raised expectations due to experience and all that, which is fine; I want people to expect timely reviews from Tangent because I want to be providing them. But the query emails and posts are beginning to come with greatly frequency–despite our publication schedule staying pretty much steadily the same as its been since I took over–and are something of an added stressor on both me and the reviewers. I’ve got nearly thirty reviewers, and I think I need to take on more. Plus I’m worried about burning out the ones I put the heaviest loads on because of their quick turnarounds. Gleep.

Opening Lines Meme:
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Conclusion of parental visit

Packed the folks up and sent them to the airport via the MARTA. They’re on their whirlwind way to Syracuse and then to San Diego, and then back to China where they’ll stay for a week, before flying to Finland so my step-dad can teach an intensive 3-day class before they get to sightsee that area for a couple weeks. Goodness, but they’re definitely keeping busy!

Learned a few more fascinating things about my step-dad. He was in China during the Cultural Revolution (!), and with his education, was shunned as an enemy of the state. He was accused of being an intellectual and a capitalist sympathizer. His mother, another scientist, was accused of being a capitalist and exiled to the countryside. Lots of fascinating and jaw-dropping stories from that time. Now I need to read up on that time period. I wasn’t very interested in it before–finding ancient Chinese history and mythology much more to my taste–but some of the happenings from that time are stranger than fantasy.

My folks and fosteronfilm and I had dinner at Fung’s Vegetarian Chinese Restaurant in Roswell [920 Woodstock Road Suite 200, Roswell, GA 30075, (770) 643-1161]. It’s a Buddhist vegan place where they sculpt and create meat simulations out of tofu and wheat gluten. It was delicious! I had their Seafood Delight. The only meat dishes I still have occasional pangs of longing for is seafood. The fish tasted exactly like I remember fish being like. The shrimp was a little less accurate, but it was still very yummy. My mom had a faux chicken dish, and fosteronfilm had their faux roast duck. I had a taste of both their dishes, and the chef got the texture and taste of both chicken and duck down really well. I also picked up some free Buddhism literature as we were leaving–not just skinny pamphlets but full books–to add to my research pile. For local folks, I highly recommend Fung’s if you’re in the area. Their food is exquisite, and the environment is quiet and soothing. Unfortunately, they don’t seem to have a website.

I did end up getting a bit melancholy by the conclusion of the evening. I kept thinking about how I really wish I’d grown up with my step-dad as my father figure, rather than my largely absent biological dad and all the conflict and ugliness of his and my mom’s relationship. My step-dad is such a good influence on my mom. He’s an incredibly intelligent man with a kindly disposition and an easy sense of humor. And he and I have so much in common. He has a real interest and passion for the old Chinese folktales and myths, and he’s really supportive of my interest in them. Despite working in a library and being a huge proponent of literacy and education, my mom never shared my interest in fantasy and science fiction. What would my childhood have been like with him as a mitigating influence on the friction between my mother and myself, I wonder?

More parental musings

New information gleaned from folks during visit thus far:
My mother has four stepsisters whom I had never heard of before. Now, for some reason, when I was a child, my mother withheld basically all family history from me on the grounds that I was “too young to understand.” This has left me with a fragmented understanding of my family tree as she also confusingly insisted that I call all of her female friends when I was growing up “auntie.” My dad skipped out on us when I was three, and family information from his side was, consequently, a bit sketchy as well. Hence, when my doctors ask me about my medical family history, I stare blankly and go “ummm.” I actually have a better idea of my step-dad’s family tree. Anyway, two of these newfound step-aunts have passed on, both apparently to breast cancer. It leaves me feeling quite strange, knowing that I had kin I could’ve met who have died before I even knew their name. You’d think, since they were strangers to me, that it would leave me unaffected, but I feel quite sad that I never got a chance to even talk to them. . . . And I still don’t know their names.

My mother also keeps in touch with my aunt’s husband, a man who I didn’t know existed. Obviously my aunt was married, she has two kids–my cousins–and they all lived with us for a while (which, I suspect, is the only reason I know about them) but her husband was never mentioned. I thought he was either dead or some sort of nefarious super sekrit military operative of which One Did Not Speak.

My mom’s taken up belly dancing. She introduced me to dance, had me taking ballet lessons when I was three, and she’s always done Tai Chi, so yeah, a lot of kinesthetic appreciation when I was growing up. But now she’s doing belly dancing. I am inordinately amused. I bet she doesn’t wear midriff-bearing outfits to class, though.

Things that made me go huh:

In the course of their visit, my mom grabbed one of Hobkin’s hind legs (while he was napping, so she didn’t knock him over or yank him off his paws or anything), and commented that it had plenty of muscle, that this would be the tasty part to eat. She also said that his fur would make a nice coat, and upon seeing his teeth, wondered whether his fangs could be filed down so they weren’t so sharp, and as a corollary, whether we had a muzzle for him. Err. She likes animals, really she does. More amazingly, Hobkin continues to like her, even though she wants to muzzle him or file down his teeth, or turn him into a casserole or a coat.

My folks have a very different philosophy on supervisory philosophy. My step-dad’s is much like fosteronfilm‘s and mine, namely: In the end, if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself. My mom thinks you should whip your subordinates into shape so they can take over from you when you leave. It sounds like she yelled out, threatened to fire, and intimidated her staff when she was working–which, uh, sounds a lot like her parenting style. My folks get into arguments about my step-dad’s work. He’s kept on as a consultant at the university where he was a professor, so they call him in for the really hard stuff they can’t solve themselves. My mom wants him to delegate the most recent project, which is apparently a pretty complex and tricky one, to his students, but he doesn’t think they can handle it so wants to do the key parts of the research himself.

They really want me to visit China. And I’m wanting to more and more, thanks to my step-dad’s influence. The gardens, and palace, and great wall, and the history of the place just makes me go all “oooo.”

Mooncake and books!

My mom and step-dad are here. (fosteronfilm and I engaged in a manic fit of scrubbing and cleaning and vacuuming yesterday, so the house is presentable.) They didn’t sleep well last night, waking up at the ungodly hour of 4AM, so we had an early night today. We ordered some Chinese delivery (don’t ask me why my folks insist on eating Chinese food when they travel to the states) and hung out at the house.

They continue to be both enchanted by and somewhat trepidatious about Hobkin. They stood around watching him eat dinner, which undoubtedly discomfited him a bit. And my mom thumped him on the head when he was napping (she thinks his ears are cute) and pulled on his legs (ditto cute paws), and he put up with it with remarkable forbearance. I think the women in my family have some sort of animal zen. It’s the only thing that explains it. If anyone else had taken such liberties with him, there would’ve been blood.

And my folks brought prezzies! They got me a three-volume set of Journey to the West, the story of the Monkey King and assorted folktales associated thereof.

My step-dad engaged in some traditional storytelling as I was oohing and aahing over the books they’d lugged for me all the way from China, telling how the mythological Journey to the West is based upon some real events, people, and places. We discussed the Lady of the Moon, Chang’er, and the origins of the Monkey King. He’s into Chinese mythology. Is that not totally cool or what?

And mooncakes!

I haven’t had mooncake since I was a little girl. I wrote several Chinese folktales concerning the Spring Festival and the Lady in the Moon, and ever since I’ve been craving them something fierce. fosteronfilm had never had mooncake before, so we split one. (For anyone who hasn’t experienced them, it’s not sensible nor wise to eat a mooncake all by yourself. They’re quite rich.) These ones have a sweet green filling, not as sweet as red bean paste. I think it’s lotus seed paste. Yumf! Now, I am full of mooncake. Happiness.

   


Writing Stuff

Received a 65-day personal reject from Sheila Williams of Asimov’s. She thought it was “charming,” but not for her. She did invite me to try them again.

Parental visit stressing and quotation memes

My mom and step-dad are visiting this weekend from China. The house is a mess, and I’m all freaked out again. Yes, their last couple visits have actually been enjoyable, and yes I quite adore my step-dad, but I’m still stressing myself loopy about their impending arrival. I waffle between abject denial, “don’t clean, don’t prep for their arrival, don’t think about it,” to absolute panic, “AGHHHH!!!” *twitch*

Here’s a couple nice, safe, non-parental memes. *twitch*
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